Day Four: 863 Calories yet satisfied

I only ate 863 calories today yet not once did I feel hungry or underfed.  Dinner was very satisfying.  And I was so proud of myself that I went to life group and they ate pasta dishes and lasagna (MY FAV! I love pasta!) and I ate NONE!  I sat there and ate my bar like a good girl.  Of course I was a little disgruntled, but I got over it. 🙂

So I have to tell you what I ate for dinner because it was so yummy!! There are so many restrictions of what I can have and cant, especially since I have sugar issues so I wanted to be careful.  I bought some raw chicken tenderloins at Costco (about 18 lbs) and intend to eat those all week as my “lean”.  I hope I can come up with enough ways to prepare them so I dont get bored because chicken can be pretty boring – especially since I cant find a bbq sauce I can eat.  So here’s what I did:
Green: I steamed broccoli, cauliflower and asparagus in my steamer.  As the veggies cook, they drip down juice into the steam water.  As they steamed I cooked the chicken some.

Lean: I added a bit of water to the pan (instead of oil) and somewhat boiled the chicken strips.  I added a bouillon cube for a bit of extra flavor (because chicken can be so bland). I also added a few of the asparagus ends that I would have discarded (because they were tough), for flavor.  I used 1/4 tsp mustard powder and 1/8 tsp onion powder also.  Once the veggies were finished steaming I added the leftover water (with veggie drippings) to the chicken and finished cooking the chicken.  Once it was fully cooked, I removed it from the pan, leaving the watery mixture in the pan.  I added 1 tsp of arrowroot powder to the pan and cooked it for a minute or two until it was gravy-like.  I poured it over my chicken and voila! Chicken with Gravy and veggies on the side! YUMMY!!  It tasted great!  I plan to have the same thing tomorrow.

So I had a thought.  I was contemplating the verse:
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Galatians 2:20 NIV

I consider myself a Super Mom – more power charged than some other mothers – and the above verse is one of the many reasons I consider myself that.  It is not that I consider myself special of my own right.  Nor do I think that I am exclusively special and no one else can be as super as me.  I am dead to Christ and alive in Him.  I allow God to guide my life and I do my best to turn to Him on how to raise my children.  Though the Bible does say very little about child-rearing, it does say an awful lot about how to be a Christian and how to be like Christ.  So I try to take who God wants my children to be when they are adults and teach them those lessons now.  A child is never too young to learn that certain things are wrong and certain things are right.  In fact, the other day Cassie said to me, “Mommy, when I get big like a Mommy I can do whatever I want because I’m big.” to which I said, “No, Cassie. While you are able to do whatever you want you still need to make wise choices to please God and to live a good life.” then I went on to explain how I could make some poor choices but look at the consequence.  I made it all easy for a 4 yr old to understand, of course.  While she may not fully understand everything I say, she gets the point of it enough for now.

I view child-rearing kind of like building a brick wall.  You cannot build a brick wall by dumping concrete on a pile of bricks.  You have to carefully dig out the foundation and make it flat.  Then you begin to lay the bricks one at a time, carefully smoothing out thin layers of concrete between the bricks so they will stick.  The bricks are the life-lessons and Biblical lessons that my children need to understand.  God and the Bible are the concrete and I am merely the simple brick-layer who is doing what I’m told.  No I have no clue what I am doing but I do know how to lay bricks and smear concrete.  So I lay down lessons for my children and smear Bible verses – sticking them where I can in context – and pray that God leads me to make them who He wants them to be.

So am I more Super than you?  Well that depends… does the Holy Spirit dwell within you?  Do you allow Him to guide your life?  Do you prayerfully go about parenting?  If yes and you are doing your best than I would say you’re on the right track.

I don’t want to sound self-righteous.  I dont think I am better than anyone.  I believe God is perfect and His work in my life impacts my children and by His leading I am the perfect parent for my children – not a perfect parent, mind you, just perfect for my kids. 

I am doing my best and letting God figure out the rest. Are you?

xox

Day Three (again): That is yesterday…

Well yesterday was so busy that I didnt get to blog about it.  I felt pretty good, though pretty tired.  We didnt go to bed until 1 a.m. on Saturday so that is the main reason I felt so tired.  Last night we went to bed much earlier and I feel pretty good today.

I forced myself to taste the Maple & Brown Sugar Oatmeal yesterday and it was awful!!  For lunch we ate at Chipotle and I had a Barbacoa salad with loads of lettuce and tomatoes (pico de gallo).  It was very good.  In fact it would be yum to have it again today… oh well.  We enjoyed our lunch with some church family friends, the Arnold’s and the Stofans.  It was nice to have some time to chat with adults and I found out that both mom’s stay home with their kiddos and live near me.  So we’ll have to get together this week.

Lastly, Presten and I are looking into a semi-final move.  We are so tired of living in an apartment with no yard and so little space, especially with so many neighbors that come and go.  I want to be more settled.  I have not put pictures up on the wall since we got married and I would like to feel settled enough to do so.  So please pray for us that God may make this move a good one or not at all.  We only want to move if it will be a step up in space, comfort and happiness.  (I want to clarify that I dictate my happiness but it is easier to feel happy in more ideal situations.)  Really, we just want to be settled for a few years.  Cassie has moved EVERY YEAR since she was born and we want to be settled enough to break that trend.

My children are tired and hungry and therefore quite grumpy at the moment so I cant post much right now.  Time to go fix lunch and put them down for nap.  I think I’ll nap today, too.

Hope your day is going well, reader. 🙂

xox

Day Two-ish: Goodbye fat!

Skinny pants here I come!! In fact, it wouldn’t surprise me if in the end I am too skinny for my “skinny pants”!

I weighed in today and have lost 5 lbs despite not doing everything perfect.  Can I celebrate with some cake? haha! Just kidding… I’ll celebrate tomorrow with a Chocolate Mint crunch bar instead. :)  But I am totally thrilled even if its only 5 lbs.  If I lose 5 lbs a week I will have lost 20 lbs in four weeks and then 40 lbs in 8 weeks and at that rate (though its bound to slow down at some point) it will only take me three months or less to reach my goal.  I don’t have my hopes too high.  I know weight fluctuates and a plateau happens tot he best of us.  But I am confident in my abilities.  Honey, if I can squeeze an 8 lb baby out with NO DRUGS (and no pain tolerance either) after 20 hrs of labor and 45 minutes of pushing than God sure can help me reach my desired weight! Having a baby was tough.  This is a breeze…  And just think, when all this fat is gone I can finally consider baby number 3.  Cassie continually reminds me that I need to stick to my diet so I can have her another sibling.  In fact, she has been a super mini-coach.  Presten taught her a little bit to say to me if I whine about wanting sugar.  I knew he had so I tested her by saying I wanted sugar and she said in a loving yet firm tone, “Mommy do you love sugar or ME!? You need to stick to your diet so you can be healthy!”  And she sure was right. I do love her way more than sugar and if I don’t stick to my new meal plan than my old on will kill me.  I have no doubt in my mind that the old way of eating so much sugar is detrimental to my health, not to mention that it made me have serious sugar intolerance – or rather something close to diabetes if I wasn’t there already.

I charge you to seriously consider your own health.  I know that I personally would write off every soda because I “needed it” as a pick-me-up and knew I couldn’t survive the day without that bit of caffeine.  But how many things did I know were bad for me but ate them anyway.  I mean, seriously, how many foods do we eat that we know are at least not on the “healthy” list but we eat them any way. 
Consider this list:
ice cream, donuts, pizza, soda, cookies, candy of any kind, coffee, beer, really any alcoholic beverage or any caffeinated beverage, French fries – make that ANYTHING FRIED! – and pretty much anything with “McDonald’s” on it
Would any of those things be considered “healthy”?  I mean would your medical doctor (or any doctor in their right mind) recommend you consume those products on a regular basis?  Yet we do.  I know I personally consumed at least one item a day that I knew was not healthy for me.

Now here’s the real kicker: is that a sin?  Is it a sin to put in your body items that you know are doing them harm?  Isn’t that the whole argument behind not smoking or doing drugs?  We know those things are bad and the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, we should treat our bodies as such, blah, blah, blah (you have probably heard that sermon and if you haven’t I can quote it to you).  I must say this puts me in a situation I would rather not be in.  I LOVE SUGAR.  But if I know it hurts me than would God approve of me putting it in me?  Fill in the blank here: I love ___ but I know it hurts me so would God approve of me consuming it?  I’m not saying God would send me to Hell for eating a candy bar – or even for being obese.  I believe I am saved and my sins are forgiven as long as I am doing my best at all times.  But doing what I know is wrong is not my best.

Consider this Bible verse on the subject:

Romans 5: 17- 6:14 (NIV)
17 For if, by the trespass of the one man, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive God’s abundant provision of grace and of the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ.
18 Consequently, just as the result of one trespass was condemnation for all men, so also the result of one act of righteousness was justification that brings life for all men. 19 For just as through the disobedience of the one man the many were made sinners, so also through the obedience of the one man the many will be made righteous. 20 The law was added so that the trespass might increase. But where sin increased, grace increased all the more, 21 so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Romans 6

1 What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? 2 By no means! We died to sin; how can we live in it any longer?3 Or don’t you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death?

4 We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life.
5 If we have been united with him like this in his death, we will certainly also be united with him in his resurrection.6 For we know that our old self was crucified with him so that the body of sin might be done away with, that we should no longer be slaves to sin–7 because anyone who has died has been freed from sin.  8 Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him.9 For we know that since Christ was raised from the dead, he cannot die again; death no longer has mastery over him. 10 The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God.
11 In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus.12 Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its evil desires.13 Do not offer the parts of your body to sin, as instruments of wickedness, but rather offer yourselves to God, as those who have been brought from death to life; and offer the parts of your body to him as instruments of righteousness.

14 For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.

How does this verse apply?  It is talking about continuing to sin just because we are saved and our sins are covered by Christ’s blood and God’s grace.  We should instead “offer the parts of your body to Him as instruments of righteousness”.  What an awesome visual!  Can an obese person be an instrument of righteousness as much as a skinny person? Of course!  But can their gluttony stand in the way of meeting their full potential?  Yes.  This is true for any sin.  A person who is addicted to anything – be it food, alcohol, drugs, porn, sex, TV, chocolate, whatever! – is prohibited from glorifying God to the maximum by their continued sin.  That does not mean they are worthless to God and do Him no good, for all people have worth to God and if we are saved than we are doing something for Him, and even our afflictions play a part in His will.  It is important to recognize our short comings that prevent us from perfection so that we may eradicate those imperfections and meet our fullest potential for Him and therefore serve Him to an even greater capacity.

Please understand that I am NOT telling you that if you do not quit drinking soda or consuming other such things you are sinning or going to hell.  I am merely questioning the fact that eating poorly has become as normal as washing your hair every day, or brushing your teeth, and that perhaps it is a sin and does separate us from perfection.  We so often set our health aside until it is gone and then we question, “where did it go” or “how do I get it back”.  But how often do we question, “WHY AM I SICK?” or even better, “How do I stay well so I can enjoy life to the fullest until my heart gives up from old age!?”  I want that to be me.  I want to SQUEEZE every drop of goodness out of life.  I want to enjoy every single thing that God has blessed us with that we may not enjoy in Heaven.  But I want to do it all to God’s glory and, honey, believe me this fat body aint glorifying God!  And how much more good things could I do for his glory if my body weren’t so fat and I felt better and was overall more healthy??  As it is I am lucky to survive the day!  You may not feel that miserable now but consider that if you continue to treat your body like a trash can than some day it will catch up with you, if only on the day you die!  I mean this with all the love in the world.  I fed by own body whatever I wanted – which usually was some sugary confection– and now I wish I had treated it better before I felt the discomfort of it.  And by the way, I love donuts and will miss them dearly!

I hope I have made you think or at least made you laugh.

As for my eating today: I ate nothing new today and did my very best.  I ate venison (YUM! Thanks Marlene!) with a side of asparagus, broccoli and cauliflower.  Dinner was super awesome.  I spent the whole morning at Marlene Kelly’s house and had a grand time with her family and in her nice big yard!  They are a blessing to know and I’m so glad we are rapidly becoming close friends.

Whew this was long!  But it was a bit interesting to write if not to read.

xox

Day One: Starting Over!

So since I screwed up so badly the last several days I am essentially starting over with my diet, with today being day one.  I wont even BOTHER posting about YESTERDAY! (…which would have been day Five.)  Yesterday was rough and miserable and today I feel better.

Do you know the hardest thing to deal with?  I thought I was eating pretty healthy BEFORE the meal plan.  Now I am realizing that I ate a lot of foods that were high in sugar or turned to sugar in my system.  So my body was so high on sugar that it could barely cope without it.

So now here I am at the starting point.  This diet is supposed to be easy, but there are so many little tiny things you can screw up on.  The main things I’ve had trouble with are eating the right distance apart (2:30-3 hrs) and preparing the right amount of the right foods for dinner.

“The right foods” may sound silly to some of you who eat whatever you want whenever you want but on a meal plan designed for optimal weight loss without loss of nutrition the amount of “what” you eat is very important.  Obviously certain foods like french fries, anything fried, and high carbohydrate and high sugar foods are off limits.  But I also have to weigh my meats and measure my veggies so I know that I am not over eating.  Over eating is so much easier than we realize.  We eat even one portion of food and often times it is twice as much volume as we need, and I was one of those who ate two servings of too much food.  It has paid off well and made me FAT! No, Im not 200 lbs overweight but even 20 lbs of extra fat is detrimental to your health and a strain on your body.  One person suggested going to the grocery store and picking up a 10 lb sack of potatos and carrying it around the grocery store (in your arms, not in the cart) to see how it feels to carry just 10 lbs of extra weight.  I have about 40 lbs of extra weight weighing me down and I am certain it will make a big difference in not only my looks but also an even bigger difference in how I feel.

So today I didnt taste any new products.  The only products I have yet to try are the other two oatmeal flavors.  Next month I want to buy things individual and get some of the products I dont have that I havent tasted.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Family Life:

Today was particularily trying.  Cassie tried my patience at every turn. Every single time I requested her to do something or stop doing something she disobeyed me.  She argued several times and fussed more times than I can count.  I do not know what is going on with her.  I suspect it may have much to do with the fact that Presten has been working a LOT on the weekends lately.  He is going “to work” again tomorrow morning from 9 – 12 which means the kids will only briefly get time with him in the morning and unless they skip nap they wont see him again until 3 or 4.  My kids always misbehave more when they dont get enough time with Daddy.   On several occations I have seen a correlation between lessened play time with Presten and grumpier days.  It makes sense.  He is half of the parental unit.  They need him for totally different reasons than they need me.  I cannot fulfill their needs for him, nor can I begin to try.  I am so proud of the fact that Presten is a chiropractor but I often wish that he werent.  I remember my dad coming home every night at 5:00 p.m. on the dot.  We ate dinner as a family and spent the evenings together.  As a teenager we worked outside together on our farm after dinner.  Presten doesnt get home until 6:30 or 6:45 which may not seem like a big deal but when the kids need to go to bed before 7:30 it is.  It means he cannot eat dinner with the family during the week and he only has a max of 30 minutes before the kids need to get ready for bed.  30 minutes a day just isnt enough for the kids to feel loved by him.  If I had it my way we would win the lottery (or some other such get-rich-quick thing) and we would both stay home (or at least he would work limited hours) and spend our time doing much more important things.  We would do more work with the church and volunteer work and all sorts of outtings.  We would travel and show our kids the world.  Presten desires to be home more hours of the day but he simply cannot until he is making enough money in the time he is there.

It may sound like I am just complaining.  SO many people are out of work and want a job even if they have to work 12 hours a day.  But my above remarks have been on my heart since way before this resession and a recession doesnt change the way your heart feels.  My husband is amazing.  He is my Prince Charming, the man of my dreams, the man I have prayed for since I was young.  He is everything I asked for and much more.  He is NOT perfect, but he IS perfect for me.  So why would I want to spend any time away from him that I dont have to?  We love spending time together doing pretty much anything.  We love talking with each other and cuddling to watch tv.  We enjoy working on projects together and playing games together.  He is my best friend and I love spending every moment I can with him.  I want him to be happy and I know he enjoys being a chiropractor, but he doesnt enjoy spending so much time away from his girls.

So my prayer for our family is that God will work it out to where Presten can spend more time with his girls, even if it is only 30 minutes more a day.

However, dispite all this, I am learning to be content in my current situation.  I know and believe firmly that God has a plan for my life.  I know that this moment, even its frustrations, fits into a greater plan. Certain pieces of the puzzle may seem to not fit, but they will make sense in Gods time.  (Prov. 16:9 and 19:21, among many others)  The Bible tells us over and over again that God has a plan and will for our lives and we only need to trust Him and allow ourselves to be clay in His hands to receive His perfect will.

May yours and my tomorrow be filled with abundant joy – oh and weight loss! 🙂

xox

Doctor Overview: Essentially a failure…

I wrote my doctor and health coach who wrote me back and said, basically, that I was doing a lot of stuff wrong or not as well as I could and therefore not entering the coveted “fat burning mode”.  So despite the fact that the doctor put it so kindly, I feel like a complete failure and a little depressed that I am basically starting over.  Oh well.  At least this time I get to start on the weekend. 😛

Day Four: GIVE ME SUGAR AND GIVE ME DEATH!!

Have you ever really wanted something deep within you?  Not the impulsive “I want this” we often feel randomly and suddenly.  No that deep sense of “I HAVE TO HAVE THIS NOW” feeling; its almost a lustful desire for something, be it love, sex, food, or SUGAR.  I am finding that sugar had more a hold on my body than I realized.

Yesterday (day three) began great. It was tough to wake up but once awake I felt pretty great.  I ate my “meal” and got busy getting ready for my super busy Tuesday.  My Tuesdays are the busiest days of the week.  The day begins with a family breakfast  then everyone parts to get dressed to leave. We leave promptly at 8 (most days) and arrive at Daddy’s office around 8:30 or so.  Ladies Bible class and kiddos play time begins at 9:30 which leaves us an hour to fool around and chat with people at the church building. Ladies Bible class runs until about 11:30 at which point the kids and I eat lunch (almost always something from home).  After lunch Cassie has preschool from 12:30 until 2:45.  Once she is picked up we all have afternoon snack together.  After snack time I have to find something to do until dinner.  This is always something different but it usually includes car waiting time in which Wren is asleep in the car and Cassie and I just sit in the front and talk while the car is parked somewhere, often the grocery store.  At 6:30 Daddy needs to be picked up (since we currently only have one car) and then he and I have to eat dinner at some point.  We all go home, get the kiddos ready for bed and then we eat dinner somewhere around 7:30 or 8.  I try to make it a light dinner since its so late.  We watch T.V. together and cuddle then its off to bed.

But this Tuesday was much different.  The morning was the same except when I arrive at Ladies Bible Class (LBC) there awaited a tantalizing array of temptations.  We always have a nice snack during LBC provided by one of the attendees and its usually something good and often something sweet.  This particular day it was homemade two-layer lemon cake with some sort of gooey filling and creamy icing, honey dew and pineapple and lastly some sort of custard.  Hello, God, this is Maggie calling in extreme distress due to excessive temptation, HELP!!!  Did he answer?  Of course, always!  As everyone else was surrounding me with “mmm” and “ooo” sounds because the food tasted so good, I searched the room for someone to talk to.  My eyes fell upon a familiar wrapping paper that a lady was holding in her hand.  She was unwrapping a bar just like the ones I eat on my program! What a God-send!  I asked her if she was on the Take Shape for Life program and she said she was.  I sat next to her and drowned out the noisy eaters with our conversation.  I told her how tempting this meal was and she shook her head, shrugged and took a bite of her bar then said, “I love lemon cake but its alright.”  I asked her how much she had lost, "57 lbs since September”.  Suddenly the desire for sweets left me.  I remembered why I was on the diet in the first place.  The desire for sweets was replaced by something different: determination, nausea and dizziness. What? Why did I feel so awful?  I had eaten my own bar about on time (2 hrs 30 mins after the previous “meal”) so why did I feel so bad.  In a bit of a panic (I hate throwing up) I called the clinic and explained my symptoms to Leah who has been helping me with the diet.  She said she would talk to Dr. L and then call me back.  Once she called back she explained that it sounded like I was catering because of lack of sugar and if it got worse I need to come in to be checked.  As the day progressed I felt much worse.  By 12:45 I was in the grocery store with Serenity while waiting for Cassie’s class to finish.  I felt nauseous, dizzy, light headed, and felt like passing out.  I called my husband at the office and told him how I felt.  He arranged for me to come in at 1:40 and I finished shopping feeling quite disoriented.  Dr. L examined me during my visit.  He said, due to my symptoms, it sounds like before beginning the diet I was more addicted to sugar than I realized and may have been diabetic or pre-diabetic. He checked me out thoroughly and said I should be fine if I just stick with the diet and make sure to eat a often enough.

When I left the office to go get Cassie I still felt pretty bad.  The rest of the day I felt pretty rotten and didn’t get to sleep until 12:30 AM or so, which is why I didn’t post all this yesterday.

So my lust for sugar has gotten me no where good.  Sure my taste buds have been treated to amazing sugary treats, often made by yours truly, but what has it done to me?  Left me in shambles with my body falling apart at the young age of 27.  Did sugar do this to me?  Mostly yes but I did choose to eat the sugar.  Are you addicted to something?

Meal rundown:

Breakfast:
Swiss Mocha shake – hoping for a pick-me-up

Mid-Morning:
fruit and nut crunch bar

Lunch:
Chocolate shake – YUCK.  It wasn’t awful but it wasn’t something I would want to buy if I weren’t on a diet. It definitely wants as yummy as many of the other products

Mid-Afternoon:
Oatmeal raisin crunch bar

Dinner:
Lean and Green  – I had the same tomato basil pizza patty on salad that I have had before.

Evening snack
Strawberry shake – it was alright but would have been better frozen like ice cream.  Not as bad as the chocolate.

So Tuesday ended with me concluding:
If “Early to bed, Early to rise makes you Healthy, Wealthy and Wise
then
Late to Bed and Late to Rise makes you UNHealthy, Poor and UNWise!”

Hopefully I can master the former rule and leave behind the latter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As for family life:

Serenity is a terrific two year old and I love her dearly.  It is a good thing I do because lately she has been trying my patience by saying “no” to everything I ask of her.  “Come here!” I say, “no” se says.  It is not a matter of her not understanding what no means, nor is it that she loves the way no sounds and just wants to say it.  She turns her head to the side and looks at me sideways with a look in her eye that says, “what are you going to do about it, Lady?”  Don’t try to tell me that kids don’t play mind games because they do! Kids love games and they are way smarter than people give them credit for.  So I am learning more patience and learning to respond lovingly without yelling as I sometimes feel like screaming and ripping all my hair out with about the sixth “no” I hear in the day.  Its alright though because (since well before this diet) I have been losing my hair like an old dead cat!  Hopefully the diet will stop that symptom too.

As for Cassie, she is doing very well.  She was excited about the idea of e-mail but now that she has it she doesn’t want to do the “work” to read them and then reply. She does enjoy typing though and LOVE to “paint” and color on the computer.  I’m hoping to find some inexpensive but valuable computer games for her to play.  I played Reader Rabbit as a kid.  Do you remember that game?? It was AWESOME!!  It was one of those kids games that was so fun I didn’t realize I was learning.  Games like that are the best because kids WANT to play them but they are learning too.  Its like a yummy tasting healthy meal – they are eating healthy but don’t know or care because it tastes good.

Lastly, but not least, Presten: He is doing rather well.  I have been proud of how he’s been reading his Bible nearly every day and doing a blog about “what he learned”.  It has been hard for him to stick with it.  How funny it is that we value the Bible so much yet find it so hard to make ourselves read it daily.  I believe it is similar to eating healthy: we know we should but the idea of doing so is unappealing, even though when I finally do eat healthy I love the taste and enjoy how I feel.

I know these posts are a bit long.  Someone commented that I should write shorter notes because otherwise I lose my readers before the end.  Perhaps this is true but I really don’t write these blogs to rivet my readers.  These blogs are partially for me so that I can look back and see my own words speaking to me instead of someone else’s words.  Also so that someday perhaps my kids can read them and learn a little about my personality and what I went through.  I also do write so that I can teach others what I have learned but this is not so important that I am going to leave things out for fear of lengthiness.  Perhaps my posts are long but they are full of meaning and purpose to me.  If someone cannot find the meaning or purpose then they don’t have to read my blog. Simple.

This concludes my TUESDAY post which I was too busy to pose yesterday.

xox

Day three: from tired to energized!

Well today was GREAT.  I began the day feeling exhausted and grumpy but realized I hadn’t drank any water.  After drinking four or five glasses I felt much better.

I was surprised that I didn’t encounter any foods I didn’t like today, even though I tried several new ones.

I had so much energy in the after noon that I spent at least 4 hours cleaning my house.  How embarrassing that it was so dirty that I could spend 4 hours cleaning it!?  I did spend about half of that time folding clothes though.  I LOVE cleaning!! 😀

So here is my review of the foods:

Breakfast:
fruit and nut crunch bar – this tasted way better than I anticipated.  Most fruit and nut bars are a bit dry and somewhat tasteless with the fruits being mostly apples. However this bar tasted a lot like a marshmallow bar and had much more fruit flavor in the fruit pieces than most bars do.  Loved it!

Mid-Morning Snack:
Oatmeal raisin crunch bar – this also tasted totally different than I expected.  I generally do not like oatmeal raisin things but this was great.  The texture was perfect and the flavor was so much better than any other “oatmeal raisin” flavored things!!

Lunch:
Banana Cream Pudding Shake – I realized that I was eating a lot of the bars and I don’t want to run out of them before the end of the month so I decided to try a new idea.  I mixed HALF a package of banana cream pudding with HALF a package of banana cream shake and blended it with ice to make a thick milky shake.  It wasn’t awesome and definitely did NOT taste like banana cream PIE but it was good.

Mid-Afternoon Snack:
Peanut Butter Crunch bar – I intended to eat less bars but I was REALLY craving sugar so I decided to eat something I knew was sweet.  I made myself savor it and it lasted 30 minutes!  I’m proud of myself for making a four inch bar last 30 minutes.  I prolonged it by cutting the bar into eight pieces and then sucking on them instead of chewing them. YUM!

Dinner: Lean and Green (details below)

Evening Snack:
Swiss Mocha (Shake) “ice cream” – This was super yummy.  I blended the shake ahead of time and tasted it a little at dinner so I knew what it tasted like.  Then I put a lid on the “magic bullet” jar and put it in the freezer.  Three hours later I took it out, ran it under hot water just to loosen it from the sides and then re-blended it to make a sort of ice cream.  It was REALLY good and way better this way.  I was glad I tasted it before and after so I could compare the difference.  Its amazing how much difference it makes when it is cold or frozen.

Lean and Green Details:
I had something similar to the other night with the Tomato Basil Pizza Burger from Morning Star Farms.  I chopped up mushrooms and cooked them a little in garlic and water (no oil or butter).  Then I removed the mushrooms being very careful to leave the water and garlic in the pan.  I then used the left-over yellow pepper from last night (1/2 cup) and cooked it in the same pan to give the pepper a little garlic taste.  The best part about that was that after I was finished there was still water in the pan that tasted like garlic, peppers and mushrooms.  I mixed that water with 1 tablespoon of red wine vinegar.  (I really need to buy more vinegar because that’s the only kind I have right now!  I prefer white or apple cider.)  This made a sort of dressing and after refrigerating it a bit to cool it down I used it as my salad dressing.  It was much better than I expected and I will definitely be experimenting with ways of using a sort of flavored water as a dressing.  It would be less fat, taste good and moisten my lettuce. (I HATE a dry salad!!)
Next I sliced my grape tomatoes and chopped the lettuce and made a salad.  I refrigerated my peppers and mushrooms a bit and later wished I hadn’t but I didn’t want them to wilt my lettuce.  I cooked the patty and chopped it up.  I mixed it all together with the dressing and 1/2 cup of finely shredded cheese.  It was a very good salad but I preferred having a tomato dressing like the last time.  I will have to figure out how to make a sort of tomato vinaigrette using mostly water. hmm…

When I logged the meal it was a little over on the green which was to be expected since I used four veggies instead of three but I was going for variety.  I think next time I may try 1/4 c of peppers and tomatoes instead.  I want to be able to use more types of veggies but smaller amounts.  I wonder if that is allowed…

Well it was a great day and I am so very grateful I started this diet.  I would recommend it to anyone!!  But I imagine the first few days are way harder for people who usually eat more meat and uppers.  I am just missing my sugar a bit…

xox

Day two (yesterday that is)

I didnt get around to posting yesterday.  Sundays are so busy and I had a tough time.  Its really hitting me – missing the sugar that is.  This diet is so low carb I cant even have fruit!!  So no fruit smoothies! :(  But this diet is good.  I feel confident in its ability to help me.

So I am going to blog about yesterday only and I will blog about today later.

The hardest times of the day were mid-morning and mid-afternoon.  Perhaps those are the times I should have the sweetest Medifast crunch bars.  That should at least help.  I bought a diet Pepsi but it just wasnt the same…  Last night I did feel tired around 10 or so, but we didnt go to bed until nearly 12, at which point I had to eat another meal.  I intend to never do that again.

I have had super weird dreams lately and I wish I didnt.  They are not good weird but bad and gross weird.  Like last night I dreamt that I was living with my parents and they were living in the basement with my kids and I was living upstairs.  What was creepy was that the whole dream had that “oh no something bad is going to happen!!” feeling!! :P  Then I dreamt about high school and those dreams are always super weird because everyone is married with kids or whatever (all grown up) but in high school.  That just makes no sense…  And in every high school dream I am married with kids but still looking for Mr. Right for some reason.  I guess its because I  love that whole married the high school sweet heart bit.  I would have loved that.  But alas the one guy I did date in high school would have made a good friend but we just werent meant for each other.  Sometimes I wonder what happened to him…

Any way… back to the diet!

So here is what I ate and the ratings.

Morning: Peach oatmeal  – this stuff was horrible.  It frankly tasted like flour with almost no flavor at all.  It didnt taste bad and the texture was fine, it just was so bland I had to choke it down.

Mid-Morning snack:  Chocolate mint crunch bar – YUM!!  One of my favorites.  The texture was a little powdery but the flavor was perfect.  I will buy these again!

Lunch: Broccoli cream soup – I wanted something that tasted real but didnt want to fix my “lean and green” yet.  This soup did not disappoint.  I had to add a tsp of salt and a 1/4 tsp of butter buds but it was really great after the addition.  The texture wasnt really creamy but I added 6 oz of water and could add less next time. Buy again!

Mid-Afternoon snack:  Peanut Butter Crunch bar – I was REALLY struggling by now and this did help some.  The flavor was AWESOME!! The peanut butter flavor was just like Reese’s peanut butter flavor.  This is my very favorite so far!

Dinner: Lean and Green (details below)

Evening snack: Vanilla Pudding – I love this stuff.  It tastes kinda like cake batter but with a hint of coconut.  I really enjoy eating it.  I mixed it with 6 oz of water instead of 4 and blended it with lots of ice.  It made it cold and drinkable.  It was like having a thick shake.

Late-night snack: Lemon Meringue Crunch Bar – this one was okay.  The texture was perfect but the taste was almost too lemony.  It wasnt bad and it is something I would buy again to keep the variety.

Lean and Green details:
I had a turkey taco salad.  I experimented with more lean and more green since on the first day the website said I was too low.  So I did turkey, cheese, iceberg lettuce (2.5 cups!), a little tomato sauce, a little salsa, grape tomatoes, and yellow peppers.  The peppers made me burp and I used way too much turkey (8 oz). But overall it was pretty good.  I had to add the tom sauce because the salad was so dry.  I dont like naked salad!!  I like my lettuce to be almost dripping but not wilted.  After all that he website said I had too much lean but perfect on the green so I will try again tonight.

I am looking forward to all the extra energy everyone says you have.  Right now I feel exhausted and just want more sleep!!  I better drink water.

So far so good…

I did it.

So yesterday I felt a pull to eat everything in the house that might tempt me (like that ice cream in my freezer) and that included a mt dew at 8 p.m.  So I was up until 4:30 a.m.  Even so my loving husband woke me up early so I could start my plan (just as I had asked him to).  The day went somewhat well although I felt understandably tired.  We went grocery shopping this afternoon for a few last minute lean and green options.

I was really proud of myself that I walked through the store and only left with what was allowed — not a single bag of chips or sweet item (despite my serious addiction to sweets!).

So here is what I ate for my lean and green.  I thought I did pretty good but the log on this website said I was a bit low.  What do you think?

0.5 cup Raw Iceberg Lettuce
0.5 cup cheddar cheese (finely shredded)
1 tblsp Tomato Sauce
1 tblsp Salsa
6 sprays of wishbone italian spray
ONE MS Tomato Basil Pizza Pattie
1 tsp raw garlic
with
0.5 cup sliced raw mushrooms (I measured these before I cooked them then cooked them with the garlic. Did I do that right??)
0.5 cup  sliced raw grape tomatoes (I cut these in half and cooked them a little with the mushrooms and garlic.)

I mixed all the above up in a salad and it was awesome! Something I would totally eat even if I werent dieting.  The best part was that I could taste the salsa, dressing and tom sauce even though I didnt use much!  I was surprised at how great this tasted!  I only used one MS pattie so that I could also use cheese. I made certain I measured it right based on the amount of fat etc and shredded it finely.

I also had a pickle half, a Popsicle, and some chicken broth at some point during the day.

So I was very surprised that I  came out on the low end.  Should I measure my foods after I cook them?? How do I do that if I am only cooking for myself?  Then I might cook too much and want to eat that, too!

I am so glad this day is almost over.  It was tough and as I walked through the grocery store I got a taste of what a diabetic feels – desiring all those sugary foods and being unable to enjoy them!  BUT I DID IT!! Im so proud of myself. :D  God help me tomorrow!!

Ratings:

Scrambled Eggs: texture SUCKED but taste was good.  Texture might be improved if I change the way I prepared them.

Chili-cheese Nacho Puffs: LOVE THEM! I could eat them all the time!!

Strawberry Crunch Bar: Texture was OK but a bit powdery.  Taste was alright but not great.  I had to choke down the last few bites.  Wouldnt probably choose this bar but might re-try it later as taste buds change.  Left my mouth feeling dry and bad aftertaste.

Chicken Noodle Soup: Texture of the “meat” product was not good.  Overall taste was great especially once I added salt.  Noodles were tiny and unnoticeable.  Perhaps I would prefer the rice one?

Chocolate Pudding: actually really good.  I made it with extra water and blended it then placed it in the freezer for about 5 minutes.  It was cold and little frosted over.  I really enjoyed it. 🙂

Good night!