Every Time You Run

 This song is very meaningful to me because I have wanted to run away not just from God but also from life – physically and metaphorically. What I mean is there have been times that I have felt a need to just get away from all my problems related to the focused life I have – my kids, my husband, being a believer in God in a post-modernism world, just to name a few. It’s not like I do not love or care; it is more because I do and I have felt like I don’t deserve them. I don’t deserve God’s love. I don’t deserve for my children to love me and want to be with me. I don’t deserve the amazing husband I have. What is more is that I have felt like they would all be better off without me.
I haven’t had these thoughts in a while but when I have I think of many songs, including this one. Every time I run away from God, I cannot. Scripture says, (CSB version)

Where can I go to escape your Spirit?
Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
If I live at the eastern horizon
or settle at the western limits,[a]
10 even there your hand will lead me;
your right hand will hold on to me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me,
and the light around me will be night”—
12 even the darkness is not dark to you.
The night shines like the day;
darkness and light are alike to you.

13 For it was you who created my inward parts;[b]
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
14 I will praise you
because I have been remarkably and wondrously made.[c][d]
Your works are wondrous,
and I know this very well.

This is an excerpt from Psalms 139 but I encourage you to read all of the chapter.
The chapter talks about how he doesn’t just stay with us, he knows us. He knows me and still loves me.
Here are the lyrics to the song I was referring to:

Every Time You Run
By Manafest

Last night got a little crazy
I don’t remember, woke up spun with the pasties
My friends say I was tweaked out
Passed out on a dirty coach, still in the house
It kind a scares me, I don’t know
Am I out of control, always waking up still in my clothes
I wrote a note that said goodbye to pain, good bye to shame
But couldn’t find a way, I’d just cry for days
I’m so depressed, soaking wet, I can’t rest
These thoughts just beat me to death I’m un-kept
I thought of a song my mom used to sing in church
But it’s been so long I can’t remember the words

Every time you run, every time you hide
Every time it hurts, every time you cry
Every time you run away, every time you hide your face
And it feels so far away, I’m right here, with you

Every time you run

I keep sleeping in don’t want to wake up
I keep hearing from the landlord pay up
Hide my face in my pillow till the sunsets
Hung over and I haven’t seen a pay check
I took a job downtown at the factory
I was hired and fired with no salary
I keep running from responsibility
It’s seems impossible, the pressure is hitting me
I know I need to man up, or sit down
Stand up and get out of this crowd
I thought of a song my mom used to sing in church
But it’s been so long I can’t remember the words

Every time you run, every time you hide
Every time it hurts, every time you cry
Every time you run away, every time you hide your face
And it feels so far away, I’m right here, with you

Well I know I’m not ready to die, but I’ve
Sure thought about the meaning of life
Cause I can’t seem to find a purpose for me
It’s just the choices and I fail to proceed
I gotta get up, get up, get up, get up
Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up
I hear voices in my mind, ones a devil, ones jesus
I can feel it can you help me find the pieces
Like an angel on my shoulder, you hold the
Joy of the lord raising up a soldier
You gave me the song my mom used to sing in church
I promised not to quit and I remembered the words
I promised not to quit and I remembered the words

Every time you run, every time you hide
Every time it hurts, every time you cry
Every time you run away, every time you hide your face
And it feels so far away, I’m right here, with you

I promised not to quit and I remembered the words
I promised not to quit and I remembered the words
And it feels so far away, I’m right here, with you